Son, you're a bachelor boy

In front of me in the newsagent this morning was possibly the most single bloke I'd ever seen. He bought: 2 cans of some Red Bull-alike energy drink; a packet of Lambert & Butler; Zoo magazine; Nuts magazine; the Sun. And he was wearing a parka. Good effort son.

Talking of the Sun, top notch headline today of "From Russia With Lunch". Like it.

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Today's the day I'm going to get Frankenkarma! Fucking result. I need my music. XFM was entertaining for a while but I'm really fucked off with all these Red Hot Chilli Peppers "give it away box office" things (although I know they finish tomorrow), and the playlist is so dreadfully predictable. Here, XFM, give me a job as DJ. I promise to play these songs every single day: Albert Hammond Jr - 101; that Razorlight one where he whinges about America; Get Cape. Wear Cape. Fly - War Of The Worlds; Arctic Monkeys - View From The Afternoon; something by Hard-Fi; something by Kasabian; something by the Ordinary Boys; something by Bloc Party; Babyshambles - The Blinding; Snow Patrol - either that "if I lay here" one, or the one with Martha Wainwright; Panic! At The Disco - I Write Sins Not Tragedies; Muse - Starlight. Have I got the gig yet? Well?

Mind you I dunno how much I'll appreciate music tonight. My ears are ringing a lot from last night. Slayer just couldn't, and didn't, fail to be fucking awesome. Moshing there last night was the first time I've genuinely missed having long hair but that feeling soon disappeared in the shower this morning, heh. What gives with the opening band having finished their set before 1830 on a Monday night though, eh? Especially since they were (apparently -- I missed them) possibly the best of the 4 supports. Bah. Anyway.

Dear In Flames: be better. And faster. Really, much faster. You're supporting Slayer for fucks sake. Stop singing. In fact, just play Take This Life and then fuck off. Did you catch, when you said "what do you want to hear now?", that the crowd shouted "Slayer"? Innit.

Dear Lamb Of God: I thought you were going to rip my face off? You were alright... but actually I think I prefer you on record. Mind you I did think yer last two songs were shit hot and done really well. You don't half sound like Slayer and Pantera though.

Dear Children Of Bodom: 2 songs that sound like DragonForce and then a load of nonsense? Get it sorted. I'm told you started off as a black metal band. Try that again.